The day I got some "head"

Whew Lawd...I never ever thought I'd see the day where I'd blog about certain hazards. But, in light of a recent event that occurred in my life, it is a must that I do so, simply because, if I don't do it now, I may not live to warn y'all about this phenomenon. Now I usually exercise caution with most things I do in life...I am very observant by nature, and I am pretty good at detecting warning signs for potential complications and "mishaps", (spoken like a true nurse...awww!) but I did not see this one coming at all. This blog entry will be about something serious, something I'd like to refer to as:

HAZARDOUS SEX

A little while ago, I was in a bedroom just minding my business, when my bf walked in and gave me that "look"...the look that says it all, followed by the wink & the gun, wink wink, tongue click and 2 thumbs up. Next thing u know, my clothes were coming off, like "Oops! Oh my!" and we were getting it in. Switch positions, it's now him on top, putting in major work. Everything felt real good, our bodies were doing all the talking, reacting, responding, synchronizing needed for the cause. Then the bed started moving. But he's on top, and if I'm paying attention to everything, then I figure, he should be doing the same thing, right? I mean it's only fair. Right??!
Wrong! I keep forgetting that men do not think like women do, and that most of them can seemingly only focus on one task at a time. So back to this moving bed, with the motion created by the "ocean" it appeared that the bed moved 2 feet away from the wall...and from the headboard. Ok so it was my fault that the headboard was not screwed in properly, but that's not the issue here. I dunno what got into us, but the "motion" increased in intensity and right as I decided to allow myself to lose focus for one minute and close my eyes while biting my bottom lip, the headboard fell on my head. Ouch!
You'd think he'd stop for a minute, but noooo, he got about 5 deep thrusts in before he realized that I had been "assaulted" by a wooden headboard. He was focused, man! Eventually, I guess he had to stop to make sure he wasn't smashing a dead woman, but once he realized I was still breathing and still had a pulse he burst out in a laughter...It was a rather nervous laughter, but still, a laughter, followed by a "Damnn babe, r u ok??" My response was a *blank effin stare + side eye of death*
I swear for 3 seconds, all I saw was darkness...Those were the longest 3 seconds of my life lol. Can you imagine going to the hospital and have cause of blindness : "bang-a-thon" in my medical record?? Not a good look at all.
So I decided to come up with a few tips to prevent u all from being the next victim of hazardous relations.
1) Make sure the headboard is properly fixed to the rest of the bed
2) If the heaboard isn't attached properly, have extra pillows to put over ur head and face when the relations get more intense...Just in case! (Im sure some of y'all won't mind not looking at ur boo's ugly ass fuck faces anyway!) LOL
3) If u r fucking on a bed and it starts moving, get off the bed and fuck on the floor instead. Be
adventurous! (have tylenol extra skrenff to treat the back and knee pain after the sexcapades!)
4) Have a flashlight nearby. In case a headboard falls on ur boo's dome, flash the light into their eyes and make sure that the pupils are round and equally reacting to the light. This will quickly assess nerve damage (providing ur boo doesn't already have some kind of nerve damages). This is a VERY BASIC, but useful exam.
5) I've heard about physical injuries as well (like a dislocated shoulder following a swift kick to the shoulder when she came, locked jaws, leg cramps, etc...) So be attentive to what ur lover tells u but also to what they are not telling you. Some are very sneaky lol.
6) Drink some water! It's not a good look when u pass out from dehydration and exhaustion.
7) Have some back up lube just in case!...Friction rub is painful to both lovers!
8) Last but not least, practice safe sex (or as safe as can be if u r in a long-term, committed relationship)

I hope I was able to help a few! But whatever u decide to do, have fun with it!
Toodles!
xoxo

Waiting...Not anymore

Ok ok, so I know, I haven't been around in about 10 whole months of Sundays...and *someone* has been telling me for quite a while now that I need to update my blog...Ok so between my new job as a Cardiac Surgery Research Coordinator (moving on up!), a very BUSY summer (summer school, guests at home damn near every other weekend, and traveling, I can honestly say that blogging was the last thing on a sister's mind. The people closest to me knew enough of everything that was going on in my life... But anyways, I'm back, like crack...Ok no, maybe that's not the best thing to compare myself to, even though I am addictive and someone once accused me of ruining their life...damn. That's a fucked up thing to say though. Ok so maybe the comparison fit to a certain degree. LOL.
Not.
Moving right along ---------------*moving*----------------------> Your girl has been nurturing, cherishing, embracing, loving, adoring a new love...Actually it was a love that's been there for a while, but for some reason, I've done everything in my power not to fall...And I fell. The beautiful thing about it is, that he was there to catch me and return the nurturing, cherishing, embracing, loving and adoring. So yay @ love. Pure Love. Unconditional Love. It's amazing how love forces you to see things about urself though, and I can honestly say that this has been the hardest task so far. Perspective. Self-Assessment. Self-Realization. Perception. These are things that we don't always think about...Love changes people. Whether good or bad, love has the ability, the power to change you as a person. I remember that a few years ago, I always waited for the evil, highly anticipated but feared :
OTHER SHOE TO DROP!!!!
So I never opened up completely, always stayed guarded with my thoughts, my feelings, my heart...Just in case something extremely bad happened. When things were great, I used caution in expressing my excitement, my happiness, my joy, just to prepare myself for the eventuality of a relationship disaster. It's crazy how we program ourselves not to fully embrace greatness & happiness, and what this says about us as people. Being so guarded and fearful in the past has forced me to come to a realization; I told myself the other day : "Self, do u know that all but one of ur exes got to know the real you?" Scary shit... Imagine being with someone who is scared to fully open up to you, to tell you what their thoughts, feelings and emotions are, even when things are good...That's not healthy.
Right now though, I can proudly say that that I don't wait for the other shoe anymore...I have learned to live in the moment. So when I'm happy he knows...When I'm mad he knows... When I'm sad he knows. He knows. I'm not afraid anymore, it feels like a tremendous weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. It feels great. And this not only applies to my relationship, but it applies to my life in general...Shit, all my life I've described myself as outspoken, when in reality I only became outspoken when the other shoe actually DID drop. You know, when I was so broken that to me there was actually nothing left to lose, I expressed myself so naturally and freel. I no longer hold back thoughts, feelings and emotions that have the potential to make a difference and it's oh so therapeutic. I'm not only talking about negative thoughts either. I know now that whoever is in my life and currently loving me (friends, fam, man, etc...) is loving me for ME! Flaws and all. Try it. You'll love it!
xoxo

Yes Wii CAN! (ok that was kinda lame...)

Ok my next addiction...SMH, I cannot even keep u all guessing. The title of this blog gave it away. Sooooo, yes. I was given a Wii (the last one available in Montreal that weekend) as a late Xmas gift. See, I never thought I'd become addicted to a video game...Don't get me wrong. I was born in the 80's and my parents got us everything from Atari, Nintendo, Nintendo 64, Sega CD, Sega Genesis, Nintendo 64, Super Nintendo, Game Boy, and Playstation...So yeah I played with those as a youngin and had a lot of fun doing so...Fast forward to now. I heard about the Wii so many times on the news and its benefits, and my curious nature got the best of me. I did my own research and decided I wanted to get one. Then I heard about it even more, so I decided I needed one badly... For months I have been tracking it on various websites in order to get one, and for months they have been sold out. Every store but Ebay Stores ran out...and the prices on Ebay were damn near hilarious...Ranging from 600-800 bucks...Yeah, that's a car payment and 3/4 of a mortgage payment...No thanks. So I finally got my Wii...didn't get to play with it until the next day cause I had to work late...but when I finally hooked it up...My oh my. There were no words to describe how happy and excited I was...I was having too much fun! Way too much. I tried the Wii Sports and played around for 30 mins and I was amazed at how much fun I was having. Suddenly I didn't feel as bad about skipping the gym all week long. I worked out (played) in the comfort of my home and I felt so good. The boxing is my favorite. After every K.O, I raise my hands in the air and do a lil "victory" dance...And my Mii (my Wii avatar) mimics my moves...She's baaaaaad! Bad as in good! Just like me...She just be killing 'em on the ring! The other day I (well SHE) K.O'd 5 dudes in a row...so I was like "Somebody, anybody, please gimme some ears to chew off cause I'm feeling so Mike Tyson'ish right now!!!" I am also loving the tennis game...I get my Serena Williams on and it's a wrap! No one on the tennis court got presidence like me ( presidence = new term replacing "SWAGGER" in 09 )... I am a BEAST on the court! No for real...I kill em. Bowling is fun too...I suck so hard @ baseball and golf...but what is funny is that I used to play softball and took golfing classes a few years ago. Go figure :-/ The golfing game is soooo funny cause there is an audience "Ooooh'ing and Awwww'ing" outta nowhere. I get a lot of "Awww" cause I clearly need to step my game up on the golf course. Baseball, I won't even discuss. So yes, I am officially addicted to :

Wii (smh)

I dunno if I can ever thank him enough for this beautiful gift...it was well worth the wait. I cannot wait to get home just to play with it...Oh by the way, it is a brutally honest game...My Wii fitness age was assessed

(http://http://www.nintendowiifanboy.com/2006/11/12/wii-sports-training-and-fitness-modes-documented/) and I was kinda disappointed...I thought I was doing so good LMAO! But anyways, I know that I need to decrease that number and bring it closer to my REAL age...Doesn't matter though, I still had fun trying the various games...My next purchase will be the whole Wii Fit bundle. Hopefully I will have as much fun with it... I'm @ work now and cannot wait to be reunited with it...Until then, I shall be dreaming about it. I hope.

Ok gotta go! :o)

What are YOU doing?!

Ok so it's a new year...New pic. Jacked from Shepard Fairey's theme for his Obama "Hope" and "Change" posters...Surprising? No. As u can tell from my previous entry, Barack Obama is my *obsession* ...ok sorry he's my current hero. He's so inspiring...His inauguration moved me to tears, something like 50-11 times...I felt beyond proud and honored to witness such a GREAT historical moment...I've witnessed 9/11, and it was such a devastating time...I've witnessed a black HAITIAN woman here in Canada being elected as Governor General of Canada and it made me feel proud! Witnessing Barack Obama though...wow. I can't even find the words to properly describe how I felt...Oh and it didn't help that I was on full PMS-mode. So the tears...yeah, they were ridiculous! Outta control...But I'm so glad...So proud! So inspired. So moved! I loved it! I cannot wait til he comes to Canada...I will make it an obligation to be present. Obama shirt and all...

Umm, this post wasn't supposed to be Obama related...but I just couldn't help it. I woke up in the middle of the night from tuesday-wednesday so I could catch some highlights of his inauguration on the news...And I couldnt fall back to sleep...the moment was so magical...Obama, Mr. (black) President....u owe me some much needed sleep! TY in advance...

My holiday season was...it was ok. I was with my Dad, spent good times with him. He's the bestest dad...ever. Period! Made me laugh so hard, I was in tears. The rest of the time I was alone. I worked. Nothing special. Santa was good to me...I hope everyone had good times! I wish you all a wonderful, healthy, lovely, prosperous, successful 2009...

A few posts ago, I mentionned my addiction to my Blackberry...It's still pretty serious. The night my BB was out of order, I chatted with a close friend of mine in the middle of the night, and he told me about this cool website he just couldn't seem to get enough of. He sent me the link...and since I was bored outta my mind and in full BB panic/crisis/hysteria mode, I decided to check it out...At first I checked it out in hopes that I would find a beautiful soul who could help me revive my precious BB, but alas, I didn't find anyone to help with that tragedy. So I decided to browse around the website, came accross pages dedicated to or managed by artists, celebrities, models, politicians (BARACK OBAMA too!!!) and the website become more and more intriguing and interesting...I created an account for myself...and since then, I think I am slowly, but SURELY developping an addiction to..... :

*~TWITTER~*

(bows head in shame...)

I constantly check it out for updates, or to get my Twittering-On, add new folks, follow folks around...I couldn't get enough of it, so I downloaded the TwitterBerry application for my precious BB. It's such a cool website...it's great for nosey folks...To use Twitter, one just has to answer one simple question : "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" in a maximum of 140 characters...Sounds simple...It is. It's also potentially addictive. I have been trying to change my profile picture for the past hour, and I keep getting a message telling me that Twitter is over-capacity and to try again in a few...Every second, someone updates their Twitter page by answering the simple question "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" I just checked the public timeline and I counted 20 ppl who had updated their page less than 5 seconds prior to the time I checked it out...And I stopped at 20 but there were many many more...So thanks to my friend DirtyLove, I have a new, completely crazy, funny, cool addiction and it looks like it's just getting better!!! OK gotta go...Gotta make sure I can upload this new picture and read the lastest updates available...! Gotta love it! I feel so dirty inside...lmaooo!

Twit-y'all later!

Dee

(add me on Twitter : AhhDeektiv)

PILF (all in jest...really)

My oh my...It's a siberian -17 F outside (-24 C) and I'm here browsing online, looking at my favorite gossip website (*shoutout to http://theybf.com/ *) and what do I spy with my little eye???! A picture of a shirtless President Elect Obama *drool*. I must admit, Obama has something extremely charming about him...He's not the handsomest dude, but his swag is ridiculous! And I mean that in a swaggalicious type of way! He's IT! If he was in the "game" he'd be the hottest dude in the game...I've been following Obama-related news since he appeared on Oprah with his wife Michelle like 2 years ago...I was instantly drawn to him, his poise, his eloquence, his mannerisms, his entire aura was just interesting to me. I was intrigued at first...Now I can say that I'm somewhat addicted to this great man... Yes I love me some :

President Elect Barack Obama

To me, he is not just "the American dream"....Hell I wouldn't know about it anyway cause I'm Canadian...lol. Obama is more like a worldwide dream...I think people all over the world can identify to him and genuinely admire him, his determination and his upcoming work in the White House. I remember seeing the self-proclaimed Obama Girl aka Obama's biggest fan in the whole wide world, and thinking to myself "man this chick is crazy!!!" Now I still think she is kinda crazy, but at the same time, I think I kinda, sorta understand her....A lot. I sympathize with her.

I just think that Obama gives a lot of people hope. He's a person who followed his dream, despite all of the obstacles he encountered. Often times, we give up on some of our dreams because we don't feel strong enough to overcome obstacles that come along the way. Sometimes we feel inadequate or incompetent and end up miserable because we did not follow our dreams. Obama inspires me to strive for a better position in my life. I've witnessed him holding on to his dream and achieving what he aspired to. He's an example to follow in my opinion. He's a well-grounded individual, he is a family man, a husband and friend to his wife, a father to his daughters...and the official next president of the United States of America. I can only pray that he is as effective at carrying out the elements of his dreams as Mr. President, as he was in attaining his position as President Elect. Either way, I'll be watching and I'll continue to support and pray for him and his family... Man, if Obama decides to come to Montreal or even a nearby province, I can guarantee that I will be there. It will be a wrap. I'll call-in sick in advance if I need to. LOL! I need to see this man live at least once in my lifetime...Thanks to him, I have witnessed history, but I hear that there is nothing like seeing this man in person. The way he can captivate an audience with his presence is indescribable. He's so impressive...And I'm already impressed!

...As I procrastinate about taking my chunky self to the gym, I think of Obama making time to jog, or hit a basketball court or gymnasium while running the most important campaign of his life...So umm, what's my excuse? I really have none...I just lack the determination to go to the gym more often. I think I will print out pictures of Obama at the gym and add a caption to it...Something like "IF YOU DON'T GO TO THE GYM, U WILL REMAIN CHUNKY" maybe that will motivate me...Or maybe I will just look at him and drool some more...Hoping that Mrs. Obama is not lurking in the background somewhere, just waiting to throw a chair or other miscellaneous items at me....Or hold me in a mean chokehold and make me cry...Omg. The horror. *blank stare* Nah....she wouldn't do that...Would she?

Omg I heart Mr. Obama...

Toodles!

I'm assuming that it is just like crack...

*waving*

Omg, I've come to the realization that I have been in denial about my next addiction for the longest... Now, there is no denying it, I can't even try to supress the feelings that are attached to this next addiction I'm about to talk about... It's kind of shocking too, because I have never been one to give much importance to material stuff...Honestly, there are a lot of things I can live without...but this? Nope. I can't even front....I'd seriously be playing myself if I even attempted to *purge* myself out of this addiction... I can't hold it anymore, I have to shout it out and let it be known to the universe that I'm EXTREMELY, RIDICULOUSLY addicted to :

My Blackberry

It never ever leaves my sight. I *sometimes* bring it to the bathroom with me...I carry it on me at all times...I bring it in my bed (not the bedside table) , I even put my purse in the backseat, while it stays on the passenger seat...and if I completely lose my mind over it one day, I will ask my passenger friends and family (well minus the parents) to join my purse in the backseat too, and leave my Blackberry in the front seat. I've made it to work late on several occasions, just because I've accidently left it at home, so I had to go back to get it...One time I left it in the staff room @ work, and I started having palpitations at the thought of losing it... Even when that happened, I still wouldn't admit that I was addicted to it... Pure sadness :o(

One day, I was already running late for work (my lateness is another habit I'm trying to purge out) and I left it at work overnight....That night was one of the worst nights for me....I couldn't sleep on my break, I kept on checking all the emails attached to it, to make sure I was not missing anything. I kept on calling my voicemail to make sure I wasn't missing any calls... Finally around 4 AM, I checked my GMAIL account and saw that I had one email there that was sent around 3:-something AM...I began to see red...Only to realize it was an Amazon.com book suggestions email...Still I was pissed that I was Blackberry-less for one night...When we were finally reunited in the morning once I got home, I made sure that I did not miss ANYTHING, not a text, a phone call, a PIN-to-PIN message....everything was fine and I could finally sleep peacefully... 2 weeks ago, a Blackberry Operating System upgrade gone wrong has caused me to *kill* my Blackberry...every single piece of information, data, applications, media files, themes....everything was lost...All I had was a white screen and the word "reset" in the center of the white screen with "error 531 or 581 or 731" Anyways, long story short, this turned out to be a fatal error, and I was not able to recover any of the information that was lost in the process... I spent a total of 6 hours trying to figure out what could've went wrong...called my service provider (Rogers Wireless), tried many different solutions, none of them worked...That night, I was in such "emotional" distress that I signed up for a Twitter account...I actually even chatted with "offbrands" on my Yahoo messenger list...just in case one of them would happen to know how to help me bring my "Precious" back to health... (I know that was shallow, but hey, I was a damsel in uber distress) . Alas, none of them knew what to do, which is why they shall remain listed in the "offbrand" category. I slept for 4 hours that night, and went to the Rogers Wireless store with my dead Blackberry first thing in the morning to see if they could get it fixed...Unfortunately there was nothing they could do, the update I was trying to install was not compatible with Windows Vista, which is what I used...I ended up having to buy another Blackberry. I could not get a replacement because the problem was not caused by some type of defect. I was not too happy about having to spend that extra money, but I couldn't live another hour without it...It's my addiction...My Crackberry, My Precious. It's right up there, next to my love for shoes...

I wonder if there is some kinda Rehab program for Blackberry Addicts Anonymous? Im sure there must be something out there...I mean there are a bunch of websites for Blackberry Maniacs, and I have visited a few of them and people just keep on signing up to get the latest in Blackberry goodies, the latest news, latest applications, latest upgrades, etc...I am just amazed at how practical Blackberries are, and how essential mine is to my daily life. It is the best thing I have ever purchased. I wanted the iPhone for a hot minute, but that minute ended a while ago and I have never revisited the thought of buying an iPhone...I do require an iPod touch though....I think that will be my Xmas gift to myself this year.

Ok gotta check on my *baby*, she needs to be put on the charger over night...So she can perform to her full capacities tomorrow :o)

Toodles!

iPurge

So this is my *brand new* blog...I will try to do better with this one than I did with umm, my Yahoo 360 page and even my Myspace blog...Although I started off real good on Yahoo 360...I was ADDICTED to that blog, then I neglected it so much that it became a distant memory...RIP Yahoo 360...you were my most preferred outlet for a long while... :'(

This time around I wanna do things differently...I decided to title my blog "AhhDeeKted To..." For each of my blog entries to come, I will try my best to talk about something (or someone) that I'm currently loving/needing/cherishing/stalking <----not in a Eminem/Stan type of way, that requires too much of my precious energy... I also want to allow this to be as much as a positive outlet as can be....although I'm not sure how realistic that is, since I'm as moody as they come sometimes...

So...Right now as I am typing this....I am AhhDeeKted to ( or trying to be) ..... :

PURGING

(not the bulimic, self-inducted vomitting and sh*tting type of purging...Just thinking about that makes my stomach itch! )

Straight from http://www.thefreedictionary.com/purging :

purge
play_w2("P0668100")
(pûrj)
v. purged, purg·ing, purg·es
v.tr.
1.
a. To free from impurities; purify.
b. To remove (impurities and other elements) by or as if by cleansing.
2. To rid of sin, guilt, or defilement.
3. Law To clear (a person) of a charge or an imputation. Often used with respect to contempt of court.
4.
a. To rid (a nation or political party, for example) of people considered undesirable.
b. To get rid of (people considered undesirable). See Synonyms at eliminate.

My current preferred way of purging involves getting rid of a whole bunch of undesirables...Not only ppl (that's rather easy), but also attitudes (my own), and habits (my own). The last two are hardest to do...I've been really trying to adopt a more positive outlook on various things surrounding my lovely life... See, typing this has made me realize that I even forgot how lovely my life really is...not by comparison to bad situations, just in general....

But yeah, it's not easy... Which is ironic because the attitudes and habits I'm holding on to are somewhat toxic to my life and interpersonal relationships...Well maybe toxic is too harsh of a word, but I know that these habits and attitudes are detrimental to certain aspects of my life...I'm all for self-realization and self-growth...I pretty much excel in various spheres of my life, biggest example is my career...I've always been on the move within my field and it just keeps getting better for me. I get offers and promotions that are totally out of the blue and it's a great feeling to know that most managers see me as a great addition to their team. My role at work however, does not define me as a woman...well not completely. Once I leave work, I am just me. My problem is that sometimes I tend to be inedaquate >in my own opinion< with the people who matter the MOST (meaning not my co-workers or anyone work-related). I want to be nicer to them, love them more, appreciate them more, give them back AT LEAST as much as they give me, but sometimes, my attitude really sucks...I'm stubborn. I'm spoiled. I'm perfectly imperfect at times.

So I need to purge. I need to rid myself of the negative things that may hinder the progress or the maintenance of beautiful life experiences. I'm all for a healthy balance in all aspect of my life, but for now, I feel like the negative outweighs the positive where it really shouldn't. I guess I'm having a hard time because purging in itself is never a pleasant experience, but I'm purging for a good cause. I'm happy to be making a conscious effort towards purging. I've successfully purged pseudo-friends out of my life...and the end result was quasi orgasmic! What a great feeling!!! My life became better almost instantly.

So I will share my personal Guide to Successful Purging :

- accept my faults

- offer positive reinforcement instead of pointing out the obvious negative

- adopt a more sympathetic attitude

- do unto others.... (I can't remember the whole quote LOL! but yeah, that whole ethic of reciprocity principle...)

- agree to disagree

- be more caring and less careless

- keep an open-mind

I know these sound more like a "How to be a better Person" Guide....but in order to achieve successful purging, I have to successfully work on myself...

Ummm, I'm Dee...and I approve this message :o)

Toodles!

P.S : TY *co-star* for approving my blog title idea.... xoxo